TIL I’m gay
Use chapstick
Read a book in public
Not go to gym
Play certain more “feminine” games
Those off the top of my head. I live in a nation of backwards idiots, so there for sure are more
Dance. In a troupe full of girls. Honestly, it was me and 15-20 girls.
Other boys literally called me gay for dancing, while they went and played whatever sports they did and then all went into a locker room and showered together etc.
I honestly never understood how they thought dance was gay. I don’t understand it now.
They didn’t either. One idiot started it out of jealousy (i presume) and the rest just parrotted him. People and their group dynamics…
Ok so the whole “the other kids are just jealous” thing is, I think, disengenious.
Sometimes kids just suck. They make fun of other kids for anything. They aren’t necessarily jealous. They might be uncomfortable. They might be vindictive at the time. They might basically be playing “spot the difference” (i.e. that kid dances, my friend doesn’t dance, look that’s different) so they make fun of one side of that equation.
In this case, I feel like the kids probably were not jealous. I feel like they were just idiot kids. Same end result but I don’t know, it seems unhelpful to bullying victims to just tell them that everyone is jealous of them, sadly that’s not usually the case.
Sure, who knows. I just assumed that some boys were very jealous of the rockstar with a whole group of girls 😁 But yeah, kids can also be just idiots. We weren’t there.
And sure it’s not usually the case, and i wouldn’t tell that to any bullied kid. It just screamed jealousy in this particular case.
Spending hours with a bunch of ladies and possibly touching them in intimate locations.
vs
Spending hours with a bunch of guys and possibly touching them in intimate locations. Then showing with them.
Yeah, dance is way gayer.
I got called gay for wearing a kilt in america. What’s funny is I had my girlfriend as well as a female friend with benifits with me at the time. I didn’t even bother responding.
I’ve heard plenty of guys say that doing any kind of ass play, even with a female is gay.
Bathrobe.
Making quiche for brunch. Apparently an omelet is fine, but a scrambled omelette is gay.
Right?!? There was this whole “real men don’t eat quiche” thing that I remember from the 90s. What is unmanly about putting an omelette in a pie crust? It makes it easier to eat on the go and keeps better in the fridge.
Plus a properly made one is fucking delicious
It was an actual book in the 80s! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Real_Men_Don't_Eat_Quiche
wow
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Stand in awe at a replica of Michaelangelo’s David.
Admittedly staring at a statue of a naked guy, but come on
Yeah, you don’t have to be gay just to be able to admire art.
Though it doesn’t appear to hurt!
Heh come on.
I went roller blading on the boardwalk along the beach during the pandemic and got called gay
It wasn’t your skates that did it; it was your crop top and hotpants. j/k
Well are you? I don’t see any proof you’re trying to deny it.
Roller blading is less gay than roller skates.
🎶I got a brand new pair of roller skates you got skint you knees, let’s get to together and touch together our peepees🎶
I think the outfit determines how homosexual either appears, or if you are actively penetrating a man or being penetrated by a man.
In some coughcough** cultures, penetrating a man is a demonstration of masculinity and dominance and somehow doesn’t make you gay.
There is nothing more masculine than gay sex
Fun fact, this is why I got laid so much in Mexico. I took so much straight dong on that trip I should have gotten frequent fliers miles
Agreed. Rollerblading is very 90s.
I haven’t thought about this in like 20 years but when I was in middle school late 90s some kid had an album where one of the songs was titled “You Rollerblading (f-slur)” and I remember thinking it was the worst music I had heard in my life. 90% sure it was grindcore music, I didn’t know what grindcore was at the time but my memory of the sound kind of fits that mold and the album had like fifty tracks and every single one of them was like 10-15 seconds long.
I suspected this was an Anal Cunt track by the title and looking it up proved my suspicions correct.
Looking at this now, you are correct, and while I wasn’t proud of myself for having thought the song titles were funny, I feel a bit more embarrassed now than I did two minutes ago before looking it up. Edgy teenagers were clearly this band’s target audience.
I found out about them during the Napster/Kazaa era looking for 311 songs and their song “311 sucks” came up. I thought it was funny, then again, I was an edgy teenager at that time.
There was a show, Human Giant I think it was called, which was like skit comedy. Aziz Ansari (spelling?) was in it. In the skit, he was talking about rollerblading and I lost it when, with a straight face, he said, “the hardest thing about rollerblading is telling your parents’ you’re gay.”
wearing colorful clothes (wtf)
Listening to metal music with female singers, on two separate occasions. The first was Planet Hell by Nightwish (from the End of an Era concert), and the second one was either Eluveitie or Dalriada.
I got called gay back in high school for listening to Brackish by Kittie. Never understood that one.
Really?! That was the second cd i bought. Still love that album. How the hell does liking hot metal chicks gay?!
Fellas, is it gay to speak Gaulish?
Tarja-era Nightwish is so good.
Pull through parking. You know, where there are two spaces so you drive through one into the next so you can pull out of the one you park in without having to back up? I got told that was for “girls and gays”.
If pulling forward into an empty parking space in front of your car is gay, then I guess you’d better start calling me Elton John. What the actual fuck?
Rocket man
Not sure if related, but my wife once told me it was hot watching me put my arm behind her passenger seat, look back and reverse out of a car space.
Now I need to know… are reverse cameras also for girls and gays?
Along those same lines, aren’t backup cameras becoming standard in vehicles?
They’ve been mandatory on all new vehicles since 2018
They’re puttin’ cameras in the cars to turn the friggin’ trucks gay! (/s for those who don’t know the reference)
That really clashes with the reality of how truck bros actually park. Or does it…?
Truck bros park in the dead center of 4 spots.
Yeah, sorry, that was me today. Weird day. I’d back up 4 times and still not be able to see the lines.
Get a smaller truck, jfc. What if the lines were children?
Lying on the ground in a parking lot? That would be weird, but maybe they could have called out directions to help me get into a parking space.
It’s the same car regardless of location. If you can’t see the parking lines then extrapolate, idiot.
Real men know that there is a greater tactical advantage to backing out of a parking spot instead of pulling out.
I once got called the f-slur for having the audacity to read a book in public, outdoors in front of the library.
It’s okay, you can say “fatty” here.
Is this gay erasure?
I think this is gay eraser
It’s reality; this fat gay book nerd got called fat derisively MUCH MORE often than the f word
One story my husband shared with me was when he and my dad stopped into a local bar after working hard on home renovations all day. They planned to get some dinner and have some beer after a hard day’s work but needed to wash their very dirty hands first. So they went back into the bathroom and washed their hands. Well apparently that was too “gay” for the owner of the bar and they went over to the bathroom and started saying things like “I don’t know what you think you’re doing in there” and “I just need to make sure you’re not doing anything funny”. So they ended up just leaving while the guy yelled at them saying they had to buy something.
A slightly different version of this concept also happened to my husband. At one point, 2 of our lady friends were talking about fashion and my husband, who is MUCH more fashionable than I am, chimed in. They proceeded to tell him that he’s “not allowed to have an opinion because he’s a man” which is the most double standard bullshit I’ve ever heard come out of any of my friends mouths. It’s stuck with me for a long time now because I think it keeps me honest with myself about standards and reminds me to think about how opinions change when you flip genders.
They planned to get some dinner and have some beer after a hard day’s work but needed to wash their very dirty hands first. So they went back into the bathroom and washed their hands. Well apparently that was too “gay” for the owner of the bar and they went over to the bathroom and started saying things like “I don’t know what you think you’re doing in there” and “I just need to make sure you’re not doing anything funny”.
Fellas, is it gay to practice basic personal hygiene?
Washing your hands implies you touched your penis and touching penises is gay.
Only straight way to use a urinal is helicoptering, got it
I usually just wet my pants to avoid touching my own penis so I don’t get perceived as gay. Shit, I just used the word perceived. Gay af.
I think the bar owner thought they might be going into the bathroom to do gay stuff, not that washing their hands is gay.
Two men walking in the bar and going straight to the bathroom together. Man jumped to conclusions.
Well it is called “homophobia” and a “phobia” is an irrational fear.
He lives his life in fear of two consenting men. Lol
I had the realization recently that homophobes think of gay sex as often as I do; but they have to jump through mental gymnastics to get it while I simply open up app and I’m back to normal an hour or so later.
I can’t image how hard it is to be happy and hold such a defining part of your life with such contempt at the same time and that was the first time I’ve ever felt sorry for a homophobe; it was for Aaron shock.
They went in straight. All good then.
The conclusion id jump to is that they were going in there to do some drugs.
Wait… you’re not washing your asshole are you?
You can’t be having fingers near your butt, same with wiping
Fellas, is it gay to not eat dirt
Both of these broke my brain.
I grew up in the 90s so just existing would cause people to call you gay.
The 90s. Cross your legs, gay! Wear a shirt with a loop on the back, gay! Express any emotions, gay!
The 80s: clear your throat in too high of a pitch? Get followed to the bathroom and the shit kicked out of you.
F
Nostalgia is gay dude.
They called us metrosexual
My dad used to call me this non stop. I didn’t know what it meant and he kept saying I was effeminate because I cared about the clothes I wore. I wanted to look good for the girls.
This, to my dad, made me gay.
Oh no sorry that’s just gheyyy! It’s a different thing altogether
I was told I’m gay because I like knitting.
I mean, yes I’m gay, but not because of that.Knitting is a form of computing and computing is women’s work. So yeah, super gay, just like all the other programmers. /s
We’ll programmers do enjoy their programming socks
My programming does suck sometimes, but I wouldn’t say I enjoy it.
There’s a knitting community, but it’s pretty slow. Crochet gets a little more action.
It would be really weird if that was cause and effect. I like to imagine how that might go down though.
