I (21M) live in an Ohio household of hardcore Trumpers who, unfortunately, found out that I voted for Kamala Harris.
My father and brother are fascists. They believe in killing anyone who disagrees with Trumpism. My mother is not violent, but drank basically all the QAnon Kool-Aid and is batshit insane.
I am disabled. My cognitive ability suffers severely if I sit up or stand up for more than a few minutes. I also have another condition that requires me to avoid bending my neck, so I have to keep it straight. I also can’t safely lift anything that’s heavier than a few pounds, so anything more than that is very risky. I can push and pull fine.
I am also financially-dependent on my mother at the moment.
We moved to a new house recently, and the walls are very thin. That allowed me to overhear a private conversation between my father and brother.
My brother said that he hates Harris supporters so much that he wants a day of retribution where he goes on a violent rampage to kill everyone he knows who supports her, especially gay and transgender people. When my dad asked if that included me, he did not hesitate to say “Sure.”
My brother is in peak physical condition. He owns guns and has military training. I had long suspected that he is the biggest potential threat to my life, but gaslighted myself into thinking I was overreacting. Today, he confirmed it.
My brother isn’t the type to throw out threats of violence willy-nilly. He has also physically abused me in the past when we were younger and has major anger issues. I believe that I have to take this threat seriously, and that means that I need to evacuate ASAP. I think the most likely day for him to act is on election night or shortly after, which would give me just over a week. But then again, I can’t be sure. Maybe he is planning a surprise.
My mother is too unreasonable to take any of this seriously.
I have a few thousand dollars and Democratic relatives from the South who might potentially take me in, though I don’t know for sure if they will, since we’re not close emotionally. I also don’t know if my brother will go out of his way to target them once he notices my absence. He is going to an out-of-state Trump rally this week, so I know that he doesn’t have much trouble crossing state lines.
I don’t know where my birth certificate and social security card are, other than that my mother has them somewhere. My father is home the entire time and stays in one spot where he can see everything. Even if I knew where they were, there is no way for me to retrieve them without him noticing.
Fuck fascism. I was born to a family of vile abusive sociopaths. It was hell the whole time. I won’t miss any of them. Fuck them. They are a disappointment to the rest of my family line. I spent my entire life learning how to become a decent human being in spite of it all and now the fuckers want me dead. FUCK. THEM.
The thing that separates me from the rest of my family is empathy. I refused to hate the people they wanted me to hate. Instead, I listened to their stories and befriended them. I care about everyone, not just straight white Christians. I voted for Harris because I wanted the best for everyone, which means preventing the installation of an authoritarian regime. And for that, I must pay the ultimate price.
I may never get to experience love or deep friendship, but no matter how this all ends, I vow to spend the rest of my days pouring out as much love and joy as I can out to every last ally I meet.
Any advice would be helpful. I don’t want to wait, but I also can’t do this without some kind of plan. I have no idea what the fuck I’m doing, so any input is appreciated.
Thank you.
Nothing to contribute to the conversation here, but fuck, I’m so sorry you have to go through this. Please do let us know if you get out of this alive.
If you’re as disabled as you say and either you have documentation (such as state benefits) or it’s just obvious I would try APS (adult protective services) over the cops. Things will move faster and more effectively if you do some of the legwork (hypothetically speaking) for them ahead of time.
-
Get in touch with the family that might take you in. Try to find three options who confirm they will take you. Write down or keep in a Google doc or whatever their: full names, phone numbers, email addresses, and physical addresses. The number one thing I see holding up cases like yours is housing, and if you have all those details worked out ahead of time a caseworker can do a lot more for you a lot faster. A lot of the time our psych social workers can get someone a uber / lyft or bus ticket easily enough, the problem is figuring out where they’re going. If you have the contact info of someone they can call right there and then who has already agreed to take you, you are a slam dunk open and shut case. Get three so you have backups.
-
Arrange for a ride locally such as a friend or acquaintance or literally anyone else who has a car and is willing to help you for 24-48 hours. This should not be hard to talk someone into. Many people want to help a person like you but don’t have the resources to house someone for weeks or months. For this acquantaince you are an easy way to help and feel good about themselves. Use that. Tell them to wait for you to contact them. Again, try to get three options set up so you have two failsafes.
-
AFTER you’ve done that, call your local APS (adult protective services) or file a report online. Do whatever you can to keep your family from knowing you called because it might take a few hours up to maybe even a day or two for them to get to you and you don’t want your family tipped off in the meantime. Tell them you’re being held by your family and kept from accessing your legal identifying documents like your birth certificate. If you get state benefits your documentation or papers regularly mailed to you may also have a compliance / abuse reporting hotline number somewhere on it. You could also try a crisis hotline through an organization that does community outreach. Tell them they have abused you in the past and you are in fear for your life. Tell them you HAVE A PLACE TO GO you just need help getting your documents. Again, you are easy to help in this situation, they don’t need to worry about setting you up with benefits or housing or anything, just transport maybe. This is what the numbers and addresses are for, they may want to confirm you have somewhere to go and even have options. Just play up the danger and that they’re keeping you from your documents. If you get an asshole worker wait six hours and try again (change of shift) or try calling a different agency or the next town over. You may also be able to find other places to call or worst case scenario call 911.
-
The SECOND they show up and if they’re able to get you those documents, get the hell out to that person who’s helping you locally and block your family and do not tell or hint or give them any other indication of where you’re going. Don’t even tell the person giving you a ride if you think it will get back to them. If necessary tell them an entirely different final destination and just get them to get you to the airport / bus terminal and get out.
-
while you’re waiting, get all your medications, medical equipment / supplies, any valuables or sentimental items, and 3-5 changes of clothes all in the same area of the house. Make sure to pack sentimental clothing but especially pack accessible clothing that’s easy for you to dress yourself with. Get them into a bag if you think you can do so discreetly, but a box or even just a pile in an out of the way corner is fine. If you have any special skin safe shampoo or other non-medicine but important toiletries stash them too or just make sure they’re all in the same place in the bathroom. Get everything into 1-3 discreet / hidden piles so you just need to throw them in a trash bag and go. If there’s any valuables you think your family will try to dispute ownership of, try to get any receipts or photos of you wearing or using them or texts from someone who bought them for you or whatever else you can find and put them in a Google drive folder or email to yourself. Worst case scenario though, be willing to leave some things behind if you have to.
Good luck and godspeed. :)
You really need to break those paragraphs up. If you want to give people advice to help them out, the very first thing you need to do is care about how you’re presenting that information. OP even said they have issues with cognitive function sometimes, so help them out by not giving them sold blocks of texts.
And I can tell you as someone who is intimately familiar with the workings of the Ohio Department of Job and Family Services, the assistance available to OP will depend heavily on how their local country office is run. It could be as easy as you say, it could also be an absolute cluster fuck that takes weeks for no resolution because the county office has been butchered by local conservative leadership.
If you’d like to edit the thing I wrote for free at 2am to include your edits for clarity and more localized bureaucratic knowledge, I’m happy to link right to you at the beginning. Other than that, you’re welcome.
Actually, none of this advice is actionable for OP because Ohio doesn’t have exceptions for disability for APS. You must be 60 years or older.
“Adult” means any person sixty years of age or older within this state who is disabled by the infirmities of aging or who has a physical or mental impairment which prevents the person from providing for the person’s own care or protection, and who resides in an independent living arrangement.
It looks like certain countries may extend those benefits to 18-60 year olds with disabilities, but only if they have funds, and only specific a handful of counties. It’s absolutely no guarantee because the law does not require the DOJFS to respond if the person is under 60.
Honestly, if they follow your advice, the DOJFS is likely to just call the cops anyway.
This is the best advice, in the best order, which I have seen laid out so far.
To which I will add:
Assuming you do have at least a valid Drivers License… it should be possible for you to attain your own copy of your Social Security card (which is not actually a card, its just paper) and Birth Certificate.
For the former, you can make an account on ssa.gov , and it is not too hard to get a Social Security card mailed to wherever you end up. Just say your old card was stolen.
As far as your Birth Certificate… theoretically it should be possible to attain a copy through some kind of State records office/website, though I’m not familiar with Ohio specifically.
Finally, when you are settled in a new safe place, if you have not already tried, apply for SSI and/or SSDI from Social Security.
Its a mountain of paperwork, takes up to a year or more, but if you can get any form of guaranteed income, that’s better than 0.
As far as your Birth Certificate… theoretically it should be possible to attain a copy through some kind of State records office/website, though I’m not familiar with Ohio specifically.
Vital Statistics
Here’s the info from Ohio:
https://odh.ohio.gov/know-our-programs/vital-statistics/how-to-order-certificates
You know, you’d think conservatives would put family before politics given their stereotypical “stated values”. But I guess that all goes out the window when their conservatism morphs into something closer to fascism.
Not all, but a whole lot of American Conservative ‘family values’ boil down to Dad is always right, no matter what he does, no matter how objectively wrong he is.
Petite authoritarianism, chauvinism, religious fundamentalism.
I grew up in a right wing, fundamentalist Christian household. Many, many American Conservatives have been like this for decades… they just used to do a better job of masking, pretending that they have a principled, respectable ideology.
Hero.
-
I wouldn’t call the police as the others have said. That might instigate more anger and violence from your brother.
I would seek an abuse shelter first. They could provide you with the things you need and take care of you. Here’s one example.
Absolutely agree with you, but one thing to note is the existence of what’s called representative payees. OP would have likely had to sign a form for it at 21, unless they were verifiably incapacitated at the time, but a rep payee is, for an intents and purposes, the beneficiary as far as the social security department is concerned.
Which is NOT to say don’t leave. It just means that OP needs to contact social security the instant they are clear of danger or being overheard.
The moment you’re safe, contact the SSD and ask them to verify your status as the primary on your account. If your mother (or someone else) is not the rep payee, then you’re clear. If they are, you need to ask for the paperwork to transfer your benefits back to yourself, which may involve having to go through a judge. That said, keep a record of any communications between yourself and whoever the rep payee is. Ohio is a one party consent state, meaning you are legally allowed to record your phone calls as long as one party is aware and consents, namely yourself. Text based communication is easier, though.
If you are able to contact anyone (guessing you can since you’re posting this) I would suggest contacting progressive organizations in your area. Women’s shelters, even if you’re male, may be able to help you, or direct you to someone who can help. Gay organizations often have some resources in place for teens who have disowned. The DSA, the episcopal church, the metropolitan community Church, the United Church of Christ, any Sikh, Buddhist, and often Hindu community centers are also notorious for being home to progressive members. Sadly, they likely don’t have anything in place for such a rescue mission already, but they may well be a member willing to assist.
Best option is if there’s an anarchist mutual aid org near you, but that’s unlikely.
I wish you all the luck and success in there.
This also ended up longer than I anticipated going in, so posting it as a full comment in and of itself, too.
I don’t know how things go in the USA but in my country if anyone was to threaten to kill me, like a real threat not some shit talk, I would call the police and they would deal with that. Even more so if I told them I have a disability of some sort and can’t defend myself.
Also, you need to contact a social assistance office, or whatever you may have like that in your town/region/state, because you need to get away from them and be able to sustain yourself. A change that will most certainly take a lot of your energy and focus — one more reason to let the police deal with the death threat.
Unfortunately, calling police in America may put you in danger. It’s one of the many, many reasons I’ve left. I don’t think people quite understand what it does until they’ve lived in other, safer places.
Unfortunately, calling police in America may put you in danger. It’s one of the many, many reasons I’ve left. I don’t think people quite understand what it does until they’ve lived in other, safer places.
That is not how the system is supposed to work. I never went to the USA and probably never will (there are a lot of reasons and people that would make me want to go mind you, but there are also way too many things I’m just not OK with). So, like I said I really can’t tell but if that is like you say, that’s very problematic.
I mean, there must be some legal authority to call for help. Self-defence, adding violence to already too much violence, can’t be the only solution a State has to offer to threatened citizens. If that was, what use would there be in such a State?
No, it’s not supposed to work like that. The biggest advice to give to foreigners is to not to talk to cops in America. I’m not afraid of asking for directions in Europe from them, but I wouldn’t do the same at home. They forgot they are civil servants and are being trained on a warrior mentality. It will not end well, however it does. The other social services are there, but underfunded. It’s often about catching the right ear of someone that knows the system and it’s contradictions which takes time. Naturally wealthier areas and cities have more options. Ohio isn’t the best place to find help, that whole state is suffering. I grew up next door in the Rust Belt.
They forgot they are civil servants and are being trained on a warrior mentality.
No, you’ve forgotten that the police are the armed defenders of capital and the state, and they do not exist to serve you, never have, never will. And that this is valid for every state, not just the united ones of America (of course gun culture and generally being ahead in the race towards fascism makes America worse than many, I’m not denying that, my point is that the police as a concept exist to supress and oppress civilians in defence of capital and the state).
Fuck the Pinkertons. ;)
A CAB 👍
100% this. Police exist to protect capital.
Where did you leave to, if you don’t mind me asking? Was it a difficult process?
I’m in the UK. It was a lot of long term chess moves that probably wouldn’t be applicable for you. If you are interested in leaving check out:
https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/skilled-worker-visa-immigration-salary-list
https://immi.homeaffairs.gov.au/visas/working-in-australia/skill-occupation-list
Most countries have these shortage lists. They are how to fast track in.
Edit: There are positions on this list that do not require 4 year degrees, e.g. care aids. They can be tough jobs and low paid, most agencies are shit but it will get you out. You will be helping people.
Most police forces in the US were infiltrated by fascist white supremacists long ago. It’s why even in very progressive places like Seattle, the police forces are under federal supervision for racism and so many POC are murdered all the time. It’s rarely worth calling them. Mostly I only report crime for insurance purposes.
Mostpolice forces in the US wereinfiltratedcreated by fascist white supremacists long ago.Not trying to be pedantic, I just think it’s really important to remember that that’s what the police have always been for.
Things should work in the ways you describe. Sadly they often don’t due to untold decades of lowering funding and general neglect have made the systems we have in place for our most vulnerable slow and bad enough to be worse than useless. They’re actively harmful.
People who are disabled from birth or before working age are religated to a minimum assistance payment that does in no way meet the basic requirements to live in most places in the United States. Filing for that is a lengthy process that’s often arbitrarily refused and requires even more time and effort put into it for (in many cases) a total payment less than the federal minimum wage monthly.
This is why you’re seeing a lot of comments about OP getting moved in with family.
Leave now. Fuck your stuff.
-
get a cab
-
get a Greyhound to an area with a better outlook.
-
look for roommates in your destination city on the ride
YES! Get to the city any way you can. If you don’t have any money see if you have something to trade or sell. Go to a homeless shelter, some have case workers who can help you. Some cities have shelters just for victims of abuse where they make sure your identity is hidden and they can help you get setup with housing and other assistance. You’ll likely have more options since you’re disabled. Your family is less likely to go to a city to find you. You deserve way better and I hope you find peace.
-
Even if there is no attempt to kill you, the physical abuse and attempts to force you into vulnerable and risky situations will, and you are already vulnerable. Maybe you can contact some form of social service or disability services and report the circumstances. Some guides suggest contacting the police, but it wouldn’t be my first option - maybe try to contact probono lawyers who could help you like this https://www.ohiojusticefoundation.org/tom-and-gerry-cincinnati-attorneys-contribute-hundreds-of-hours-of-pro-bono-service/ in case things get serious. Leave a trail that indicates that the threat has been made. You can also try to get in contact with organizations like Ohio Democrats, but do so quietly. I’d try to lay low if I were you until you can move out, maybe even just throw them a bone by trying to virtue signal their cult thinking until you can get away safely. Definitely clear or hide your browsing and account history so they can’t trace it back to posts like this, and maybe just leave a less threatening persona account that if they do find they would have less of an issue with.
This is a long reply. I’ll do it in spoiler tags for the convenience of people who don’t like that.
It sounds like you already have your answers on what to do, which is the question everybody is trying to answer:
- You believe you are at real risk, so you need to get out.
- You can’t safely access your primary ID documents, so don’t (or if possible before leaving town, go the APS rout suggested by another commenter). Take any secondary ID you have with you and replace primary ID later.
- This is the one you seem least sure about, but you’ve identified your best safe destination, at least to start. Go to your Democratic relatives, and plan next steps from there. I’ll add to this and other “what” questions in a reply
There are two other ways to understand what you’re asking for in this post.
The first is validation to build confidence in your decision.
You have it.
Nobody is in a better position than you are to judge the seriousness of the situation. Trust your gut and get out.
The other way of reading the question is not what to do, but how. Logistics. This is the thing that hasn’t been addressed.
I am disabled. My cognitive ability suffers severely if I sit up or stand up for more than a few minutes. I also have another condition that requires me to avoid bending my neck, so I have to keep it straight.
This suggests you don’t drive, and that long walks or waiting at a bus stop aren’t good options for you. Since you’ve presumably lived with your disability for some time, I’m going to assume you have local transport options sorted out - please reply with more details (level of urban, distance and size of nearest cities if rural, details on who drives you places if applicable, social connections) if if that’s wrong.
You may or may not not have much long distance travel experience. How have you made longer trips in the past, other than your parents driving?
Driving
- Convincing a liberal friend to drive you to a red state within a week of the election is a tough ask - even if they are willing and have the time, they may not feel safe doing so. If they do, they’re also more likely to downplay the risk from your brother. Most people who can do this are not working: retired, unemployed, or stay-at-home parents.
Unemployed friend should be your first choice here: probably happy to make the trip if you cover gas and lodging. Stay at home parent is less likely to be able to get away because of the need to handle childcare. Retired people you know are probably also connected to your parents, which make them riskier options.
- There are also websites and apps for pairing strangers with and without cars going in the same direction. Usually the person with the car will want gas money from the one without. This is a riskier option for you. It may also take longer and require you to make temporary arrangements to stay somewhere locally, and even then not work out.
First, don’t use Facebook for this - too easy for it to get back to your family. Use your favorite search engine or app store to find a “road trip carpooling” tool. Probably as manybas possible, if you choose this option.
With your disability, you’re more vulnerable to unsympathetic or even politically hostile drivers. When they ask about your trip, don’t tell them why you left. You’re going to visit family you haven’t seen in a while. Talk about things you’ve done with them in the past, and what you’re looking forward to doing with them now. Don’t mention things that convey their (or your) politics.
If you’re paired with a MAGAt or someone who holds otherwise objectionable views, do not push back. Express indifference, or even agreement if that’s what it takes. You’re vulnerable both because of your disability and because they control your transportation - you don’t want to be stranded at the next rest or gas stop.
Air
You will need state ID, drivers license, or passport for this. You can buy a ticket online through a site like Travelocity, Kayak, or Orbitz. That will usually be cheaper than through the airlines. Print your ticket if you feel safe doing so, otherwise you can get it at check-in at the airport.
Show up over an hour early - preferably two, I don’t know how muvh your disability may slow things down. Check-in is probably at a kiosk. Then ask the first uniformed person you see for mobility assistance. With your standing issues, that will probably mean someone to push you in a wheelchair to TSA. Documentation of your disability may help here, but shouldn’t be necessary.
After TSA, they’ll probably send a golf cart to rake you to the gate. Once boarding is called, disability should make you eligible to board at any time. If you need to lie down to keep enough cognitive ability to recognize the right boarding call, do so, and explain to any official that tells you to sit up (but they probably won’t). Ignore any passengers that say anything about it - you don’t have to answer to them.
When you board, make the flight crew aware of the cognitive issues with sitting. Ask them to tell you specifically at each stop if it’s time for you to exit the plane.
When you arrive, ask for mobility assistance again. There will be a taxi stand at the airport if you need that. You may not want to call ahead to your family even then, so you can make your request in person not to contact your brother and parents.
Bus
Greyhound, or Megabus. You will need state ID, drivers license, or passport for this. It will be physically challenging.
Again, you can buy tickets online. I recommend this, as they sell out. If buying and printing the ticket at home is not safe, you can still plan the trip and then buy at the terminal if there is one - but it limits your starting point options to actual terminals (not all Greyhound stops have them). The ride will be long, cramped, and you will almost certainly have to change buses at some point. Bring something to do that won’t run down your phone battery, like a book or knitting.
There will be less assistance than with flying. Lying down at the station is more common, but if they’re full they’re more likely to make you sit up despite your disability. There will be stops where you can buy food. There won’t be a taxi stand at the other end, but there will almost certainly be a local bus stop.
> I also can't safely lift anything that's heavier than a few pounds, so anything more than that is very risky. I can push and pull fine.
Do you have a rolling small suitcase you frequently use for taking things with you when you go places nearby? If so, pack what you can in that. Ignore things that can be easily replaced (personal care items, fashion clothing, etc) and plan to replace them when you get where you’re going. Thrift stores are your friend. Focus on things of emotional, medical, or financial value. If there’s room left, pack underwear since that can’t be gotten used.
If leaving with anything would be unusual, don’t. Getting you out is the most important thing. Everything else is secondary. If you go the APS route for your ID, they can help you retrieve some belongings at the same time. Otherwise, plan to figure it out later.
I’d add shelters to the list if you can’t immediately get direct travel to family. Many provide support services as well which can help you on your next steps.
Great breakdown! I’d like to add train to the options. OP might be able to utilize an Amtrak train for a portion of the trip depending on the travel destination. Here’s a map of their routes. Tickets can be purchased online, they offer assistance for disabilities, and they have places to lie down or eat food.
If you decide to fly OP, consider getting a pack of gum to chew on to help with pressure/popping in your ears during altitude changes of takeoff and landing.
Thank you, I thought I missed one! Again, this will also require some form of ID. It also provides greater leg room and comfort than airplane or bus. The seats also recline more than either of the others, which may be helpful given OP’s cognitive issues with sitting up for extended periods.
you have to put
::: spoiler button textat beginning, not just::: button textCaught that within a few seconds of posting, but edits seem to take longer to propagate than the original comment
Print your ticket if you feel safe doing so, otherwise you can get it at check-in at the airport.
You can also just have it on your phone. You don’t even need to use Apple Wallet or Google Wallet, most airlines just give you the PDF file. @sprigatito_bread@lemmy.world
maybe you should stand your ground in self defense. stop letting conservatives push you around. fight back for once.
EDIT: omg. i just read your story and i take back my words. this is awful and those people are dangerous. someone else should be fighting on your behalf. let’s all ask ourselves, what good would this person’s family do for the world if they continue to exist? like, why? these people are actual wastes of human flesh. ffs people, band together to stop this shit from continuing.
Honestly I would report the threat to the FBI. He is planning terroristic murders across an entire population of the general public and across state lines.
If you have an extended family member who is sympathetic, that is the best. Otherwise, look for somebody who is sympathetic and older with a spare room or something, if there’s some task you can help them with, even better. Older people are likely to be more stable and better understand their own limitations.
If you have an ID you should be able to get a copy of birth cert and social security by applying for them, if your family messes with them they can get fraud charges. You’ll need to file a change of address for disability etc. Try to work things out as possible.
The other thing you should do is see if some anarchist is willing to put an airtag or similar on your brother’s truck to monitor him. This will mean if your brother does end up doing his murder spree he can easily be tied to the murder at the least.
As panicked as you are, take a second. Murdering family for political views isn’t exactly on the table quite yet. You’re still afforded freedom and justice and even if people dont think you should have it they would have to cross a line that they’ve never crossed before to exact their cruel punishment. Use these social norms to posture an exit route but do not fear standing up for yourself. None of us are there physically so you are your last line of defense. You can also start a live stream assuming you have a phone which should be another layer of protection.
I’m also not saying be confrontational. I’m saying if the need arises stand up for yourself, it will throw them. Just be sure to have an exit strategy for each situation and assume you can only play that card once before they talk themselves into disobeying societal conditioning.
Bullies are just scared little children on the inside. Murder, no matter how brain washed you are is not a small leap. I suggest you use this fear to build the courage to leave. Though your greatest fears may never be realized it takes a humongous toll to live with that sort of stress.
Contact APS like suggested and they should help you along but make it clear reconciliation is not something you would like to pursue. Even if you can imagine reconciliation being helpful now is not the time and you’ll thank yourself later for making this choice.
Also, cops arent inherently bad people. Some cops have disabled family. Some cops are left leaning. Some cops just firmly believe in the letter of the law. It’s a gamble, for sure, but not a crap shoot as others would have you believe.
First, you need to know, you did NOTHING wrong. Your family is the problem, NOT YOU.
Second, when you say you are “financially-dependent on my mother at the moment.” it’s quite likely the other way around. If you’re as disabled as you say, you should be getting disability benefits, paid to YOU, not them. Likely they were collecting before you turned 18, but at 21 those benefits are YOURS, not theirs.
Third, don’t sweat the birth certificate or SSN. Those are just paper and there’s a process to replace them, a process you can’t start if they harm you.
GTFO. Now. While you can. Take your benefits with you, cut them off and let them hang.
Absolutely agree with you, but one thing to note is the existence of what’s called representative payees. OP would have likely had to sign a form for it at 21, unless they were verifiably incapacitated at the time, but a rep payee is, for an intents and purposes, the beneficiary as far as the social security department is concerned.
Which is NOT to say don’t leave. It just means that OP needs to contact social security the instant they are clear of danger or being overheard.
The moment you’re safe, contact the SSD and ask them to verify your status as the primary on your account. If your mother (or someone else) is not the rep payee, then you’re clear. If they are, you need to ask for the paperwork to transfer your benefits back to yourself, which may involve having to go through a judge. That said, keep a record of any communications between yourself and whoever the rep payee is. Ohio is a one party consent state, meaning you are legally allowed to record your phone calls as long as one party is aware and consents, namely yourself. Text based communication is easier, though.
If you are able to contact anyone (guessing you can since you’re posting this) I would suggest contacting progressive organizations in your area. Women’s shelters, even if you’re male, may be able to help you, or direct you to someone who can help. Gay organizations often have some resources in place for teens who have disowned. The DSA, the episcopal church, the metropolitan community Church, the United Church of Christ, any Sikh, Buddhist, and often Hindu community centers are also notorious for being home to progressive members. Sadly, they likely don’t have anything in place for such a rescue mission already, but they may well be a member willing to assist.
Best option is if there’s an anarchist mutual aid org near you, but that’s unlikely.
I wish you all the luck and success in there.
This also ended up longer than I anticipated going in, so posting it as a full comment in and of itself, too.
If you’re in acute danger, call the cops. A credible threat has been made. Even if they can’t remove you or your brother, everything being on file might serve at the very least as a deterrent to execute his plan.
Thanks for the quick reply. I have a few concerns here:
- I have no recorded evidence of the threats, so I’m not sure if the cops will take this seriously. I heard that shit loud and clear, but I didn’t get an audio recording.
- I have no idea how corrupt the cops in the local area are; this is a red county, although it’s on the outskirts of a big city. I don’t know if the cops could severely fuck me over in ways I don’t know about.
- I am likely to end up escalating tensions. My brother would probably see it as an attack on him (Harris supporter trying to get his guns confiscated) and make it a priority to get rid of me quicker. He isn’t very smart (hence why he joined the cult) so he might think that Trump will pardon all violence he commits.
I’d love to be wrong, but my current impression of cops is that they are unreliable and involving them could really backfire. But if anyone has a thoughtful rebuttal, I’d appreciate it. I’m not going to pretend to be an expert here.
Please read Apytele’s comment, you are absolutely correct that calling the police will be interpreted as a threat and make your situation even worse.
You have to get out, first.
The police have literally 0 legal obligation to protect any citizen from a crime or potential crime, what they do is investigate after the fact, or sometimes during a reported ongoing incident. (Barring traffic stops, basically)
And that’s assuming they’re not fellow MAGA cultists.
Right but their comment is suggesting APS which will not help them. They are 21, Ohio’s APS program is only for people over 60.
Ah, I did not know that, thats a good point.
I know that some states actually have a broader reach for things like APS, usually including the disabled.
Someone else said it, contact Adult Protective Services. APS is meant for people like you.
This is OHIO. The Ohio DOJFS’s APS services are explicitly only for adults over 60, and moreover, they don’t just come pick you up. They send someone to investigate first and then make a determination on your need. This does not happen quickly and you CAN be be denied.
Rural Ohio native here. OP if you don’t mind sharing what county you live in, I might be able to give you better info. If you don’t want to share that (and that’s perfectly understandable), what part of the state? Northeast, Southwest, Cleveland area, Columbus area, etc?
Outskirts of Columbus, within reasonably short driving distance of the city
So first things first, all the advice you got about adult protective services is basically moot. Ohio law stipulates adult protective services only apply to age 60 and above. Some counties may extend that to adults under 60 with disabilities, but the law does not require, and they’ll only help if they have the funds to help.
You said you’re in a red county but you’re on the outskirts of Columbus. I think you’re being a little generous on what the outskirts of Columbus are. All the same, if you’re in one of the red ones that circle Franklin county, the only one that will maybe take disability into consideration is Madison.
Other than that, I think you can forget about the APS. As a matter of fact, I would bet if you tried to contact them, they would hand it off to the cops anyway.
If you’re close enough to Columbus and you can get there on your own, you’ll want to look for any support you can find there. They’ll have the most available resources, the most groups willing to help, and the most spaces to potentially house you.
Like, genuinely? If you can find a way to anonymously reach out to some local activist groups, they will be much more likely to give good, actionable advice to you than anyone here.
Discord is good, just be careful who you share your name with.
Removed by mod
You’re not helping
It’s the truth, though. Without any evidence there’s a decent chance no arrest will be made, especially if the cops are Trumpers themselves. And even if they are arrested, there’s no doubt mom will post bond so they’ll be out before very long.
If that happens, OP will very likely be grievously injured or killed.
OP needs to GTFO first and foremost.
That’s not what space noodle said. Space noodle said the cops would shoot him for not voting for Trump.
I’m not wrong.
Is he wrong, though?
This is a serious thread. No jokes and off-topic comments.
It’s not a joke, and it’s entirely topical.
Well then, Ohio’s fucked. I should have believed the memes.
My brother said that he hates Harris supporters so much that he wants a day of retribution where he goes on a violent rampage to kill everyone he knows who supports her, especially gay and transgender people. When my dad asked if that included me, he did not hesitate to say “Sure.”
Isn’t that already a case for the police or FBI or something?
My first thought also. I get people not wanting to get the police involved (i.e. some officers may share the sibling and father’s sentiment), but this is definitely a situation where authorities should be contacted. This really feels like we’re going to hear in like two months a local TV reporter say the words: “from a FOI request, we’ve learned that the two suspects were on police radar for months.”
Isn’t that already a case for the police or FBI or something?
Yes
Where the police are also trumpers? Hell no.
FBI would be federal officers, no?
Correct, and this sounds like it’s crossing state lines which means it’s federal jurisdiction.
