Interested in sewing, gardening and preserving, with a strong focus on sustainability.

  • 9 Posts
  • 18 Comments
Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: June 11th, 2023

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  • I’ve been thinking a lot about what makes for a good group since I moved to Lemmy. Small and engaged is what I came up with, and authentic is definitely part of that. A lot of people’s normal response is to look for the biggest group for everything, but I believe once a group passes a certain size it loses the ability to have good constructive discussions - at best you get a core group participating and a lot of people who just watch, but more often you lose the space for anything exept superficial conversations as everything that is not new gets lost in the volume.

    It’s a pity Lemmy does not allow for subgroups, as that would be a good option for larger groups. The best options I have come up with so far are including weekly themed posts, and ongoing posts for specific topics linked from the sidebar so they can be kept visible. I think moderating a group well involves being part librarian, not just the rules enforcement most people focus on.



  • It is less important that our hobbies are something that we are “not obliged to do” than that we are actively engaged in them.

    Many people spend their free time in activities of passive consumption - watching TV, shopping and doing packaged, purchased “activities”. The only active component is searching for the next thing to consume.

    An actively engaging hobby is very different, it involves growth and learning. Many hobbies can be engaged in either passively or actively - think of the difference between a photographer who goes out every weekend to take photos and improve their technique, compared to one who spends hours researching and purchasing equipment but rarely “finds” the time to actually take photos.

    The real difference between them is the mindset, and that can be applied to things you are obliged to do as well. My hobbies tend to be extensions of things that are necessary - cooking, gardening, sewing. All can be approached as necessary chores, but an approach of active engagement turns them into hobbies. Even scrolling the internet can be turned into a hobby - although I’m not sure if moderating a group and trying to learn enough javascript to automate things will make me a better person or lead to madness at this point!

    I guess my argument is that it is not doing things outside of what we are obliged to that is important, it is doing more than we are obliged to do. It does not matter whether that “more” is different things, or things we need to do done in a different way.





  • That was one thing that really struck me on my trips overseas (Peru & Vietnam). There was public space everyone could use to just sit, to meet up with friends etc. I spent a lot of time just sitting and watching how everyday life unfolded around me.

    At home (Australia) there are very few public spaces you are allowed to stay in without paying. Even public parks tend to be built on the assumption people will mostly just pass through, there are not many places to sit (and most of the seats are for parents around playgrounds) We meet up in coffee shops and restaurants where we are expected to buy things to pay for the privledge. Instead of visiting in each other’s homes we go out and pay for meals and entertainment. If we do invite people to our house it is generally somewhat competitive - showing off how great our house is, how amazing the meal we provide is etc.

    I do manage to carve out some space for myself, although much of it is wandering the neighbourhood with the dog rather than loitering in one spot. But it is almost impossible to do the same with others. The type of relationships that are formed from long lazy conversations doing nothing much have been surplanted by the superficial conections of shared activities. The focus is not on each other any more, it is on the activities done and meals eaten. I really yearn for a few deeper connections, but what I am finding is just expensive meetups to compare notes on what everyone else has watched and eaten.


  • I was worried about a lump too, but I was not able to feel anything. It might vary depending on where it is though - my socks wear in one spot at the end of the big toe.

    I think it is worth doing a netting stitch, and I have found it easier to do than straight once I worked it out. The wear spots happen where the sock is stretched, so I think that reducing the amount of stretch in that area would cause the darned area to wear out again more quickly.

    I am hoping to get the time soon to make a short video showing the method I use, as I made it up based on a snippet in a book I can’t find again and have not seen anywhere else that does the same.





  • Thanks for posting this, it was an interesting read.

    I have been thinking a lot about the question in the first post here, what is Simple Living? In the context of moving to Lemmy and thinking about how the sites are structured I have realised what I really value is the time to do things fully, and to be fully in the moment.

    Our society is built around consumerism, and constantly chasing the next new thing to aquire. Once we have it we just start looking for the next thing to reach for. The way we consume media is the same - a constant search for the new post, with the fastest replies get rewarded and by the time anyone has been able to craft an actual thoughtful response the conversation has moved on.

    I would like my life to have more depth, to focus on learning about things deeply and thoroughly, to be present in the moment more often and enjoy what I have around me. In moving to Lemmy I am hoping to be able to be able to find/develop some communities that foster that.

    I envisage the flow of information and communication as being like a river. There are fast-flowing rapids that can be fun and exciting, but most of the river is actually deep pools full of amazing and wonderful resources. Those fast flowing rapids have a place, but also have the potential to wash you away from all the important things underneath. The challenge of creating an online community is to be able to create a way to anchor people into deep and ongoing conversations, without the flow of new things constantly pulling them away.

    Reddit always felt to me like it was preventing those deeper conversations from really flourishing. I think the challenge for a moderator here is to find ways of balancing different types of conversations so they can all have a place - some topics can be talked about slowly and thoughtfully for weeks, months, even years. I believe to have a place in a simple living lifestyle the focus needs to be on encouraging those slow conversations. To create a place where you can drop in maybe once a week and not feeling that you are “out of the loop” because you have taken time to engage with the real world.