While growing up everything gave me the impression that sex is the best thing in life and everything revolves around it. Many of my friends had their first experiences really young and it seemed like something really exciting and something to look forward to. However after my couple first experiences I was met with the harsh reality that it wasn’t what I was expecting. I already had a long history of enjoying porn and masturbation and I then just felt like including another person added nothing to it for me. Quite the opposite really - it just got more complicated and often felt like a chore. Like asking someone else to scratch an itch for me.
I don’t know anyone else like me and I’m confused about what am I. I’m quite sexual being but I just don’t care about the act of sex itself. I resonate with a alot of things I hear aces talking about but I also feel like I’m not quite welcome in this club either.
You could be what is called a “sex-positive asexual.” It basically means how it sounds. It does sound a bit like that, based off your description though.
It’s kinda funny. Once you get to experience the act it’s kinda like… “this is it, huh? The pinnacle of human euphoria. Huh.” I think that’s where it starts for a lot of people. They start to question of they’re “broken,” or whatever, because they don’t share the same admiration of it as their peers. That is how it felt for me anyway.
Only you can tell yourself if you resonate with it, but whatever you decide on, you’re welcome here.