I go shopping with my wife sometimes and do standard husband things:

• Hold up a bathing suit and ask, “Does this make my butt look big?”
• Feel up women’s pajamas with suggestive looks…
• Read the ridiculous phrases on their clothes and just riff on 'em
• Act like a child and try to hide behind some thin dress like she can’t see me, then pop out and accuse her getting scared
• Suggest ridiculous accessories and insist she’d like good in them (she would…but it’s not her style)
• In sum, pretty much everything except help her shop