I know I kind of made a wall of text over a simple question! I would have skimmed too.
TY for the reply regardless, really JellySeerr is the thing that I want to integrate with a two-way messaging client that has a facebook-messenger-like UX, as that is the most approachable for anyone that is on the server (and seemingly everyone on the planet that has lived in the 2020’s).

Hah, very fair. Trouble I’m having is that my friend group aren’t the type to check their emails, so that takes care of grandma-demographic but does not take care of the “social media please fill my inbox” demographic. Matrix is definitely where I’m leaning, that has other applications for me anyway.