Hotrod_Jesus

Yeah, Texas isn’t kind to those of us with unique hairstyles.

Don’t tell me who to fuck.

Maybe, but THIS is one step beyond madness.

That was totally my dickhead Dad’s idea, btw. Not just the “stick your kid on a cross” idea, but sin itself. I mean, if you’re gonna create a universe filled with carnal desire, what damn right do you have to tell folks not to enjoy it?

Then, to top that absurd hypocrisy, he then goes around knocking up virgins under their fiance’s nose, declares the kid the king of the Jews (when there already IS a king who likes to behead prophets), and then tells the kid he’s gotta overthrown the Roman Empire… lemme just say I’ve considered patricide more than once.

Like this?

Yes, among many others.

All of them. I’ve replaced my skills with the hammer with those of the monkeywrench. There is no vehicle known to man or god I can’t trick out.

Side note - I see your check engine light is on. You may need a tune-up. Bring it on by the garage @13thFloor and we’ll see about a valve and soul lube job.

My Dad is such a dick.

Weak? Weak??? Fuck you you goddamn chucklefucking morons. There’s nothing weak about my writing, even taken out of context like you dumbfucks decided to do every other sentence. You can call me a lot of things, but weak ain’t one of them, you hypocritical motherfuckers. Those words are still the best selling fiction work EVER, and you idiots think that your lives are so hard the teachings are “weak”? Goddamn, people like you are what makes Dad flood shit.

Can’t believe I fucking got on a cross for these morons. That’s it - I know I’m supposed to be in recovery, but I need a goddamn drink. Anyone got a water bottle?

Fuck these hypocritical motherfuckers. This is why I work on cars now and not people.