Our Shrek who is in heaven, bless us with your swampy holiness and deliver us from the temptations of Lord Farqhuar. We worship you and your sacred donkey prophet, amen.

I just saw this starting screen before I was born.

Act like I ain’t picking Shrek, come on!

Git out muh swamp.

Whoa. Is that Shrek from Shrek 2?

I didn’t choose the onion god, the onion god chose me

No lie, I’d buy that for my wife as long as it was CZ or some other not-diamond gemstone.