Besides crypto…

  • Toes♀@ani.social
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    5 months ago

    I’d go to my doctor and get a head start on what’s to come.

    I’d go to festivals and spend more time with friends.

    Leave an toxic relationship.

    But uh you probably meant how to make cash.

    Buy Gamestop, Nvidia & Pfizer stock.

  • shalafi@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    I’d pump out the MAGA merchandise. I’m talking grift of biblical proportions.

    Would you like a cherry on top? After becoming America’s #1 purveyor, I’d go all out telling the world that I got rich suckering rubes.

    • JoeKrogan@lemmy.world
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      5 months ago

      Put the big reveal on the 3rd last page of your book : Becoming MAGA Rich , that way they have to buy the book first 😄

  • 9point6@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    Probably a several-way bet on trump winning a presidency, suggesting everyone inject themselves with bleach and then staging a coup, Britain shitting the bed, deciding to leave the EU, manifesting £60bn of debt and shocking the Queen to death, Russian war in Europe, a global pandemic killing millions getting turned into political football, the Taliban taking over Afghanistan again, several of the big names in 2016 dying, a trend of people wanting to eat laundry capsules & idk Alec Baldwin shooting someone.

    I reckon a quid on that would net me enough to buy an island with a mansion on it

    Fuck me, have we had a bad decade

  • GamingChairModel@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    Realistically, I would grieve the loss of my children, who would never be born if I didn’t line things up just right to cause them to happen again. I’d spend more time with my parents, who are getting along in the years, and I’d make the most of my time with them while they’re healthy and happy.

    There are a few specifics where I’d try to get some loved ones out of trouble before some critical tipping point that would later cause a bunch of heartache and stress.

    There are general things about money and politics I’d probably do differently, knowing about how stocks have performed and what not, but that’s not super interesting to me, because I’m mostly content in my personal life (including my career) and wouldn’t want to upset that balance by doing anything too different from what brought me here.

  • z00s@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    I would help myself become more confident, less anxious and a better person.

    I know that sounds lame but that alone would be worth more than any stock tips to me.

    Sending my mind back to the past is the wish I keep in my back pocket to blurt out if I see a falling star or meet a geanie.

  • frickineh@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    I’d wait a couple of years and talk my ex-husband into keeping our house and renting it instead of selling it when we split up. It made sense at the time, since selling it was the fastest way to pay off all of our mutual debt (and most of our individual debt, too) and make it an easy split, but if we’d waited a few years, we would’ve made a solid 6 figure profit. I have no desire to be a landlord and mostly I’m glad we sold it to a nice family for what was still an affordable amount, but it would’ve been the only way I could ever afford to buy anything else on a single income, and it would’ve set him and his new wife up a lot better. I kind of hate the idea morally, but from a purely pragmatic view, it would’ve made sense.

  • Greg Clarke@lemmy.ca
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    5 months ago

    I’m doing this from memory to stay in the spirit of the question. I’d buy ethereum, then pivot to zoom in early 2020, pivot back to etherum mid 2020, then finally to NVIDIA at the end of 2022. I’ll look up how well my memory works have served me.

    • Greg Clarke@lemmy.ca
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      5 months ago

      OK, I did the math. I could turn $1K into $74M in 10 years with that strategy. I lost a year of growth because I thought Ethereum was released in 2013 however it was the white paper that was released in 2013, the coin started public trading in August 2015. Either way, I’d still be happy with that return.

      • 2014-06-19 twiddle my thumbs because Ethereum hasn’t been released yet
      • 2015-08-01 $1.00 = 3.22ETH
      • 2020-01-02 3.22ETH = $421.24 = 6.12 ZOOM shares (also buy toilet paper and n95 masks)
      • 2020-06-01 6.12 ZOOM = $1538.262 = 6.80ETH
      • 2022-12-30 6.80ETH = $8170.67 = 570.18 NVIDIA shares
      • 2024-06-18 570.18 NVIDIA = $74773.41
  • Technus@lemmy.zip
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    5 months ago

    I’d tell myself not to waste the time, money or energy on college.

    I’m not against it in general, but going for a compsci degree when you’ve already gotten software dev work is definitely a waste of time unless your employer is paying for it. I just let my dad talk me into it after getting out of a bad job. Thankfully I only wasted one semester on it and got out because I found another job.

    Still, that turned out to be $4k in loans for just 6 units because I couldn’t file my FAFSA in time to qualify for any grants, thanks to my fucking undiagnosed ADHD father who couldn’t be bothered to file his taxes or even give me an accurate income required by the form. That was $4k I could have put into savings or invested instead.

    • kabi@lemm.eeOP
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      5 months ago

      <- should be learning for his comp-sci final whatever right now. I was hoping it would get better. And then sunk cost fallacy…

      • Technus@lemmy.zip
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        5 months ago

        It’s a troll toll. It’ll get you a software engineering job with a roman numeral in the title at a company you’ve actually heard of. But if you’re almost done then there’s no reason not to stick with it.

        The early years of my career were quite a slog, having taught myself to program. I started out on freelancing websites, competing with devs from the third world who worked for pennies a day. I lucked into my first salaried job, got hired through my cousin.

        I will say, having some theory knowledge does come in handy occasionally. You might never have to write your own hashtable, but being able to understand the implementation of the structures you’re using helps a lot to make informed decisions about how you organize and access data, especially when you’re trying to optimize for performance or memory usage.

        One piece of unsolicited advice you might have heard before is to not discount the power of networking. The best written cover letter in the world can’t hold a candle to knowing someone who can put in a good word. Make friends with your professors and classmates, you never know who might think to look you up one day when their company is hiring. My old boss still offers me a job occasionally, more than five years later.

    • kabi@lemm.eeOP
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      5 months ago

      Of course it is, but if you bought at cents and sell at $50K, then you’re only scamming rich assholes anyway.

      (And now you’re the rich asshole!)