I’ve seen Moscow on the internet! Everything is tinted grey, it’s always cold, and there’s a Red Army choir constantly singing in a minor key (usually the Volga Boatmen song). Nobody ever smiles and there’s no vegetation, just concrete and vodka-drunk veterans. If you sit down on a public bench (look near the Kremlin - every single bench has a view of the Kremlin) for more than 5 minutes someone in a long coat will come and sit down next to you, their breath misting in the air as they heave a heavy sigh, offer you a cigarette before lighting one for themselves, and then hand you an unmarked brown envelope from their coat. They rarely speak, unless they need to give you a terse update about what The Americans are doing.
Oh right. Silly me! I don’t know any of it, because totalitarian fascist communist putler of the Muscovy Horde is keeping me in the dark, unlike the enlightened west where you have freedom of speech and free press. Makes perfect sense
It’s amazing Xi and Putin even let us talk to each other. Hey, I’ll DM you a site where you can watch clips of Winnie The Pooh and Dobby. But make sure nobody catches you watching them! I feel so sad thinking about how impoverished my life is being unable to talk about these Western cultural treasures openly at work.
I’ve seen Moscow on the internet! Everything is tinted grey, it’s always cold, and there’s a Red Army choir constantly singing in a minor key (usually the Volga Boatmen song). Nobody ever smiles and there’s no vegetation, just concrete and vodka-drunk veterans. If you sit down on a public bench (look near the Kremlin - every single bench has a view of the Kremlin) for more than 5 minutes someone in a long coat will come and sit down next to you, their breath misting in the air as they heave a heavy sigh, offer you a cigarette before lighting one for themselves, and then hand you an unmarked brown envelope from their coat. They rarely speak, unless they need to give you a terse update about what The Americans are doing.
Oh right. Silly me! I don’t know any of it, because totalitarian fascist communist putler of the Muscovy Horde is keeping me in the dark, unlike the enlightened west where you have freedom of speech and free press. Makes perfect sense
It’s amazing Xi and Putin even let us talk to each other. Hey, I’ll DM you a site where you can watch clips of Winnie The Pooh and Dobby. But make sure nobody catches you watching them! I feel so sad thinking about how impoverished my life is being unable to talk about these Western cultural treasures openly at work.