- cross-posted to:
- traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns@lemmy.ca
- traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns@lemmy.ca
- cross-posted to:
- traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns@lemmy.ca
- traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns@lemmy.ca
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Lots of lies in there, also pretty sexist. No need to maintain shitty gender stereotypes.
Can’t really argue against tiddies though, they’re pretty self explanatory as the image suggests.
Wont deny that :D Maybe my response came off a bit harsh, but i just dont like when people degrade other ways of living in order to prove their point. Although i can understand the appeal of being a cute girl, it wont inherently make you a nice person.
Team rainbow checking in. This comes off more as a chaser than anything else.
That sounds like terf garbage, why are you trying to take away validation from trans women, we’re not ‘forcing gender stereotypes’ onto people, maybe if you were trans you’d understand what it’s like to not be able to live life as who you really are and be forced to pretend you’re something you are not.
They’re not being transphobic, they’re correctly pointing out that your post’s description of how women differ from men is wildly inaccurate.
I can’t tell if either or both of them were sarcastic.
hiya, am transfem
this is forcing garbage gender stereotypes
hope that clears things up 👍
I understand the sentiment but there’s a lot in the image that’s arguably gender essentialist and/or not accurate.
Some thoughts:
Titties. Self-explanatory
Indeed they are, but they’re not a necessary condition to being a woman.
Decimate your fapping addiction
I think my main issue is the implicit assumption that the viewer has such an addiction to begin with. Also estrogen has ways of compensating for a lowered libido, such as a reduced/eliminated refractory period (of course ymmv). Source: guess ;p
Ability to wear adorable clothes
Boys can do this too!
ditch your angry, masculine mannerisms
This kind of just assumes that men have angry mannerisms, and is what I take most issue with tbh.
The path to anger management is primarily through introspection and/or therapy. Estrogen will not magically overhaul your personality, habits, and tendencies; there are things it changes, and it’s helped my mental state immensely—I wouldn’t give it up for the world and it helped facilitate the changes I needed for myself—but there’s so much extra work involved to in self-improvement and actualization than just acknowledging your gender identity and taking hrt.
I agree with where you’re coming from.
From a sociological perspective (albeit anecdotal), every humanist movement I’ve ever seen in my lifetime (all the ones, I support, anyway) always seem to fall into toxic territory. Feminism is a great example. People are angry. And it’s completely understandable. These are injustices feminists, trans activists, etc. are fighting. Anger pushes people from a supportive movement for the marginalized community in question to the other side of things. Into, well, kinda hate.
These movements based on love and acceptance get bigger, which is the goal (as far as the movement itself goes, not the social issue), and—maybe this is an online thing—people in that group go from being supportive of other members of the community to spiteful and angry at the people outside of it. Or the counterparts/other social groups, for example, misandry in feminist circles, cishet people hate/disrespect in trans rights circles.
I don’t know why this is. I wish it weren’t the case. Because, when people try to steer others away from this kind of negativity, they are seen as traitors or whatever. And this, I know, is an online thing that only came up in the last few decades. Because nuance has no place in discussion anymore. People don’t know how to discuss or qualify nuance.
This comment, for example, in a lot of circles, would be downvoted because it sounds like I’m being critical of the trans rights movement—I’m not. I fully support trans people, their right to live and exist and be proud. But I am, technically, criticizing the movement itself, although I am really trying to criticize people. This happens over and over again and it only serves as fodder to those trying to hurt whichever movement. Look how feminism is seen by non feminists. Everyone within the movement is grouped together under the umbrella of the misandrists because it’s easier to dismiss the entire concept.
It sucks. Because while, yes, it is the people trying to take down whichever movement they dislike that are doing almost all of the legwork, there are always misguided people from within the movement that open that door by taking a good idea, sucking all nuance and thought out of it, and turning harmful by being…well, kinda wrong. Even if their hearts are in the right place. “Support trans rights, trans is beautiful, I love you all” turns into something that still may have that message, but tries to accomplish it by putting down or generalizing or actually disrespecting anyone outside the identity/marginalized group.
I started rambling. But this is something I think about a lot because I see it all over. The internet absolutely exacerbated this issue, if it didn’t create it in the first place.
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Girl, this community is full of trans folks, and not all of us are trans women. I’d wager the majority of people annoyed with this post are not cis, and it seems like some of them are trans women, too
It’s not even something I would post in a community just for trans women, like what about trans women that don’t end up with these characteristics? Are people only trans women if they identify with these changes? Why is the assumption that men (and I guess pre-transition trans women) have anger issues and porn addictions? Why are those qualities tied to their hormones and physical bodies, so trans women who can’t or won’t medically transition are excluded from benefitting?
validation for one group should not come at the expense of another imo ><
trans women can be validated while not making men feel bad about themselves by pointing out a skewed perspective on masculinity
thankyous - a trans boy
It’s literally just the effects of estrogen. This post is essentially the forms you’re given for informed consent, just in meme format
I don’t think HRT actually makes one’s hips wider past a certain age, and if a cis man took estrogen it would probably tank his mood, and most mannerisms don’t change because of HRT, they change because a person actively changes them. I sure hope there’s some bone growth and genetic influence left in me at 25 to widen my hips now that I’m on E, but I doubt it.
The problem with the simplified meme format is that it only shows the good, not the bad or neutral stuff. It doesn’t tell anyone that some of the meds can cause blood clots for example.
I started HRT at 22 and it absolutely made my hips wider. And yeah estrogen would tank a cis man’s mood, good thing it’s not for them. The same way testosterone can make trans women dysphoric, estrogen would make cis men dysphoric. And HRT may not directly affect your mannerisms, but the mental changes and being happier certainly will.
It’s just a silly little meme, it doesn’t need to be a peer reviewed scientific paper. Let OP share the enjoyment E brings her.
This whole trying to convince strangers they are trans thing is so unbelievably yucky and I’m certain it makes plenty of good people question their support of trans rights
Egg Prime Directive, you NEVER try to crack someone else’s egg. It is imperative to respect people’s gender identities always, that means listening to them, even if they don’t conform to traditional gender norms. If a person is taking HRT to look fem but says they’re male, then they’re male, it’s valid. No one has the right to argue that he’s semantically a trans woman, because gender identity is ultimately based on how one identifies, not ones actions, choices, or desires.
Please follow the egg prime directive.
So many people tried to tell me I was trans and I was but it just led me to me repressing memories and avoiding the topic. It was extremely harmful to me that all of my friends did this.
What worked was someone sending me to a website and saying “read this, if you have any questions, I’m here for you and I have some answers and more websites.”
It’s entertaining hearing some recently trans friends speculating on who they think is an egg… However it makes me wonder what happens when I haven’t been present.
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They’re not trying to say its “turning people trans” they’re saying it’s disrespectful and toxic to try and break other people’s eggs. People need to discover themselves at their own pace, they know who they are best and what they want for themselves. People don’t have the right to try and decide a person’s gender for someone else, that’s wrong.
Also, it reinforces gender norms. “If you’re not a boy, that’s means you’re a girl who needs girl hormones.” There’s still the entire spectrum in between. You can be either, or neither.
Classic cishet cognitive bias: It doesn’t bother me, so it shouldn’t bother you!
That’s…a cishet thing? I’m not sure it is.
Statement was
I’m certain it makes plenty of good people question their support of trans rights
So it’s very appropriate for someone who would be in the potential category to comment.
If you see one meme in passing that says “wouldn’t you feel better as a cute girl?” and your unironic reaction is “OMG YUSSSS UWU HOW’D YOU GUESS?!” spoilers - you may not be as cis as you think.
This isn’t how I expected to find out.
It’s like unironically trying to turn the frogs gay. It won’t help any good cause.
It plays into bigoted ideas. Groomers are trying to turn your kid trans! Look, here’s proof!
Thats not how trans actually works though. You can’t just be convinced youre trans if youre not. Well I suppose a male who wants feminine skin could be a femboy. But otherwise? Every currently masculine person who would like to be feminine… Is some sort of transfem.
Did I ever suggest that it was possible to turn someone trans? Did anyone?
This post is extremely disrespectful to transmascs and gender nonconforming individuals, and just in general gives really awful vibes.
First of all this assumes that a person must be transfem or a woman to want, have, or work to get these things. This is not correct. A person may desire any of these things while identifying as female, male, or even Get this, NonBinary, yeah wild isn’t it. That’s because presentation and gender identity are separate things altogether.
Which is also the reason why this phrase
-ability to wear adorable clothes
Is flat out wrong, because gender and presentation are not the same. In addition this take is extremely harmful and reinforces gender stereotypes. I know people are starting to think that’s not a real thing and that only terfs say that, but reinforcing gender stereotypes is a real thing and it’s really disrespectful both to trans and GNC people.
-ditch your angry, masculine mannerisms
This is both hurtful to transmasc people and is just in general extremely misandristic. You should be ashamed of yourself, this hating men thing is grossly reminiscent of TERF rhetoric.
-decimate your fapping addiction
Ignoring the fact that this assumes the viewer even has one in the first place (which many won’t) this isn’t even really true, because estrogen affects different people’s sex drive differently, some may lose that urge, but for others it may be just as strong, some might be even stronger. I have no personal experience (and I don’t plan on it) this is mostly gathered from things I’ve read online and the experiences my trans friends have shared with me, so take that how you will.
-improved mental state
This really depends, is E what this person wants? If so then yes it certainly would, but if they don’t it would probably cause the opposite effect. It can lead to an improvement, but only if the person wants it and the affects that come with it, but if they don’t want it, then it’s not going to be a good experience for them.
It’s a joke?
It’s not unfortunately, this same person made a very toxic post in Egg_irl claiming femboys are trans girls in denial and she attacked everyone in the comments who went against her, flinging many accusations and bad faith arguments at them.
Ew I wasn’t aware of this context lol. I thought this post was in line with the “oooo u r a boykisser” memes.
Yeah it’s not like those, she’s dead serious. Though even when it is, gender identity invalidation and sexism even as a joke is uh, pretty gross, and not really something that should be encouraged.
As someone who this meme applies to perfectly - this meme doesnt explain why I had angry mannerisms or why I wouldn’t put on cute clothes (I didnt accept myself, had gender dysphoria etc.) So its not really hitting the mark as helpful / informative even when it hits that perfect target audience. Thank you for pointing out the many other issues with it that I’m not as aware of.
[laughs in trans man] no thanks, it’s all yours.
mrow… most of these r not based on gender ithinks. if ur a man like this id just go see a doctor or a therapist. this post does seem to not like men which ithink is nothelpful and a bit mean tbh >~<
im a boy and like cute clothes, soft skin, cute hips allllll mine :3
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weelllll uve just failed the egg prime directive lmao hehe
and i dont want these things, i already have hips n soft skin. i do not want tits thankz, who said i was cis?
and yes i am a boy mrow and i will bite u about this
They have a history of doing this, they made a meme on egg_irl (here not reddit) just a little over 2 days ago saying that Femboys are trans girls in denial and that people should help break their eggs. It was removed because it’s just so blatantly disrespectful.
It definitely seems to be a pattern, I think I’m just going to block her. I don’t have the patience for it
I would too if I wasn’t a mod or if blocking prevented interaction with my content. I’m probably just going to report her offensive posts and comments.
meowza thats not nice things >< thankyou for the headsup !! <3
You’ve called people out in other comment chains as “not trans” for having different opinions than you, so let me start off by clarifying: I’m a trans woman, and have been living as such for 8 or so years now.
Please don’t say stuff like this. Enforcing gender stereotypes in this manner is gross tbh. My masculine mannerisms (which are shared and mostly employed by my enby headmate) are cute and non-angery or violent.
I can explain in more detail, if you like, why I think pushing a specific gender identity on someone who doesn’t fit perfectly with your idea of binary gender expression is a bad thing. In the end, though, you should spend some time reading these comments and thinking about things from other points of view. Don’t just take any one opinion as gospel
While a few of these points are misleading sexist, or wrong, I can personally attest to the longer thicker hair part. I’ve watched my beard grow in hundreds of times and with only a month on HRT the peach fuzz between my cheekbones and beard became long enough to pinch and tug at.
If you want smoother skin, you could always just exfoliate better. I used to think it was just guy things until my sister got this gnarly sugar and shea body scrub. Sloughs off dead skin way better than what I was using before and now my skin feels as smooth as a newborn baby.
I actually had a longer write up on a bunch of other points, but in a facetious way; however I see you’re getting enough of others taking the piss outta the humor so I’ll just leave this useful tidbit because I’m not trying to be hypercritical of a meme.
I’m too bald already for the hair, and I fixed the masculine rage with therapy and Daoism.
Tiddies tho… 🤔
You could always wear a wig!
No please give me the opposite of all that I beg of you
- inability to pee everywhere
- period
- inability to pee everywhere
Some trans women choose to keep their penis. I won’t judge them for that but personally I don’t understand it, this thing makes me hella dysphoric (especially when it goes hard). I sit down to pee all the time, even though I don’t need to, it just feels more natural ya know. Hope to get bottom surgery in the future though.
- period
I wish, unfortunately that can’t really happen for me, just another reminder that I’ll never be fully female 😭
just another reminder that I’ll never be fully female
That’s nonsense (if you mean this seriously). I’m really sorry that you feel this way and for dysphoria like that :/ but maybe it helps to say it again: trans women are just women, as cis women are (and trans men are also just men, as cis men are). You are fully female.
(For the record I don’t like this post but of course that’s independent to this.)
There are plenty of cis women who don’t have periods. It’s not a defining factor and you’re still a woman even if you don’t have a period.
Chill, I’m working on it
I’d like to inform you that those pills are actually blue where I live
I know it’s blue for me too, it just sounds more cute to say “the pink pill” makes it seem more femmy ya know.
Mine are white. But they make up for the plainness by being Epic (Pharma). (That is the manufacturer.)
I’m a cishet man and already have tiddies thank you very much.
I’m also a cis male and I got hair so thick it takes around an hour for the barber to just cut through the helmet I grew in a month, so no thanks I don’t need it to be even thicker.
Between us we’d make a beautiful woman
the girl in the illustration is lacking a few of those features, though
Damm … I’m a straight men … but you’re making this shit sound good. Maybe I should give it a try
