• pH3ra@lemmy.ml
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    13
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    1 year ago

    …now that you’ve asked me that I would feel worse for just trying to bring it up to talk about it

    Why would you feel worse? If that’s what you need, just ask. There’s no point in hiding your feelings from the people you want to spend time with, unless you want to create unnecessary misunderstandings.

    • Solivine@sopuli.xyz
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      2
      arrow-down
      3
      ·
      1 year ago

      I didn’t say it makes sense, it’s hard to justify feelings all the time, but I can give it a go. Perhaps we can work out why I think this way. These are guesses, I don’t know the root cause.

      It can sound kind of arrogant I guess, like that person can solve something you can’t. It also sounds emotionless and robotic when they say it.

      It could also sound like if you don’t want a solution then your complaining is less valid. With a partner you trust I suppose this might not be true, but with some friends I have they would immediately switch off if it’s the latter I guess.

      And a much more simple guess - most of the time I just don’t know which one of those I want, and I haven’t got to that stage yet. I find it very difficult to pinpoint why I get certain emotions and what I want to do with them, that whole process doesn’t make sense to me and I don’t understand why all these other replies seem to be able to do that and are saying it’s my fault. Perhaps this is a spectrum thing.

      • pH3ra@lemmy.ml
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        6
        ·
        1 year ago

        IDK if the thing will suit you, but therapy helped me to process and talk more openly about my feelings, so situations like the one mentioned above can be dealt in a less “awkward” way