I have so many friends who would 100% be labeled as an incel if they were men. They hold men to impossibly high standards while meeting none of those standards themselves.
For example, women living with parents while expecting men to have their own place, women who are obese but are only interested in fit men, working part time while expecting a man who has a career, refusing to drive and expecting men to chauffeur them around, expecting men to have a variety of friends and interests while doing nothing but watching TV all day, etc.
The worst part is, calling out this inequality will 100% get any man labeled as an incel. We’re expected to either deal with it or be alone forever.
This is NOT to undermine the very real issues women have to deal with, for example the loss of bodily autonomy in the US. But this is still an issue worth discussing and nobody is talking about it.
Sweetie. Honey. Dear…
There is a reason you keep hearing this phrase, this entire line of thinking is incely as heck. Having standards is not an incel trait, but being angry at women and thinking you are “forever alone” because of those standards sure as heck is! You are making a giant stra-woman just so you can be angry at it. People can have whatever standards they like and their “hypocrisy” is not your concern, but being upset at those standards is just wishing women would settle for less.
Acknowledging the right to bodily autonomy doesn’t automatically make you a feminist. Thinking women want to be chauffeured around, waited on, contribute nothing and be obese is boiler plate misogyny. This post sounds like it was wrote in the 50’s, back in the good 'ole days before women wanted too much!
You are assuming my opinions are not based on my experiences with women. You are incorrect.
Is that really your experience with women though?
To ask the question more precisely, is this really what women are thinking, or are you taking everything at face value? Because with social interactions, there is always something unsaid also going on.
A lot of these women with hard rules will overlook them when dealing with someone they’re genuinely attracted to, and the rules for that are almost never hard and fast. Generally, it happens when they develop really strong positive associations with someone, like they’re fun, they’re exciting, they’re good listeners, etc.
The rules are arbitrary. The real filter is how you make people feel.
Well, A) You already said this is based on people you know…
And B) If not that, then what are they based on? What other people say? Because you need to consider those biases when you take those opinions as your own. Label yourself however you like, but the thoughts in your post was that of an incel. Blame it on others if you wish, but you were the one who posted it. You are the one repeating it. You are the one saying and thinking these things.
You didn’t respond to anything I was saying, just labeled it as wrong. Feels more like a defense mechanism than actual engagement. You are the one who brought these ideas here today. You’re right that I don’t know you, but what metric am I supposed to understand your ideas other than engage with the things you choose to write/say?