• omgarm@feddit.nl
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    34
    ·
    1 year ago

    That’s the tinder profile “I am brutally honest”. Honesty does not mean you can’t word things nicely or not say something.

    • Norgur@kbin.social
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      36
      ·
      1 year ago

      Exactly! Way too many people confuse “honesty” and “rudeness”.

      “I don’t like that red carpet”=honest
      “This carpet looks like shit”=rude

      • Johanno@feddit.de
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        edit-2
        1 year ago

        But that isn’t the same

        That carpet looks like shit=rude

        That carpet hurts my eyes=rude and honest

      • Zaros@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        1
        arrow-down
        3
        ·
        1 year ago

        True honesty often comes across as rude. If someone asks me what I think of their new carpet and I think it looks like shit, I’ll tell them just that. Saying “I don’t like that carpet” would feel dishonest as it’s only limited honesty. (being honest about the opinion or thought, but not about its intensity)

        • pufferfischerpulver@feddit.de
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          3
          arrow-down
          1
          ·
          1 year ago

          Then you say I really don’t like it. The way you phrase things can still be rude. Or rather, you can be totally honest and find a phrasing that’s not rude. Answering “it looks like shit” is just not a friendly way of communicating.

          But to be honest I don’t give a fuck what I do, you’re probably just trying to justify your rudeness.

    • bouh@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      4
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      1 year ago

      Honesty is not hypocrisy. In a world where “he’s gone” means “he’s dead”, honestly is almost always brutal.

      Especially when honesty matters the most when people don’t want to hear what you’re saying. No amount of sugar and paraphrase will make a nice “I don’t want to talk with you”.