Helping someone escape domestic abuse and care for her animals while her dangerous lunatic ex keeps wrecking her house and farm, actually risking to put the entire mountain on fire, and the police keeps typing a pile of documents about the ongoing case without actually doing anything.
I’ll keep doing it even if I end up tearing the ‘Call us if you experience domestic violence’ posters off of the police station walls tomorrow to shove them up the arses of the smug bastard clowns in uniform who are supposed to guarantee the safety of vulnerable people.
Been a long week and no end in sight.
No, really I just happened to have all the skills and resources needed (milk a goat, look like an at least vaguely threatening garden gnome when carrying a farm tool, have a spare rest room and some spare time etc.) and I’m glad I can. I’ve been in this situation without support and will try to help others get out if it’s within my power.
Yesterday I was a bit eaten up at the edges and flashbacking heavily after so much frustration with the aggressor and the police, thus having to write the above rant. We went and fed the animals today without more hassle and are all mentally in a better place.
She’s off to find a new place to live, and we’ll make sure the animals get moved there safely. It more often than not ends up like this - victim has to leave, as authorities cannot protect them adequately or don’t care enough to do so.
Couple weeks ago I helped a friend escape a DV situation too, although it wasn’t a “house and a farm”, more of an “apartment”. Still, he had wrecked the place so my spouse and I spent a week cleaning it and organizing my friend’s stuff (and my spouse continued for another week after I had to go back to work). We found evidence of a lot of horrible shit this guy did that he left behind, but our friend didn’t want to harm him or something so we respected her wishes on that not going to the police. (Who probably wouldn’t have done anything anyways)
It was exhausting, emotionally draining, hard work but I was glad to do it, I imagine you feel similarly
I have accompanied my friend to the DV support office today and listened through a detailed account of what he did. It’s tough to listen to. Tough to come to terms with the fact that there is so little actual help available, and all of it is excruciatingly slow to arrive and locked behind bureaucratic barriers. Tough to come to terms with the fact that so many women, myself included, easily fall prey to bullshit artists on a power trip, or man sized toddlers with puppy eyes, or a mix of the two. And it’s always women who I would have thought far beyond such situations. I feel I still haven’t understood what went on inside of myself as I lived through this shit and didn’t leave, and I haven’t understood what happens inside of these guys, how they can turn from decent person into absolute shitshow within days or months.
I expect to see rather more of this as people get driven to the edge by the ongoing financial, social, political crisis all around us.
Helping someone escape domestic abuse and care for her animals while her dangerous lunatic ex keeps wrecking her house and farm, actually risking to put the entire mountain on fire, and the police keeps typing a pile of documents about the ongoing case without actually doing anything. I’ll keep doing it even if I end up tearing the ‘Call us if you experience domestic violence’ posters off of the police station walls tomorrow to shove them up the arses of the smug bastard clowns in uniform who are supposed to guarantee the safety of vulnerable people. Been a long week and no end in sight.
Wow. Awesome of you to do this…
No, really I just happened to have all the skills and resources needed (milk a goat, look like an at least vaguely threatening garden gnome when carrying a farm tool, have a spare rest room and some spare time etc.) and I’m glad I can. I’ve been in this situation without support and will try to help others get out if it’s within my power.
Yesterday I was a bit eaten up at the edges and flashbacking heavily after so much frustration with the aggressor and the police, thus having to write the above rant. We went and fed the animals today without more hassle and are all mentally in a better place.
She’s off to find a new place to live, and we’ll make sure the animals get moved there safely. It more often than not ends up like this - victim has to leave, as authorities cannot protect them adequately or don’t care enough to do so.
Couple weeks ago I helped a friend escape a DV situation too, although it wasn’t a “house and a farm”, more of an “apartment”. Still, he had wrecked the place so my spouse and I spent a week cleaning it and organizing my friend’s stuff (and my spouse continued for another week after I had to go back to work). We found evidence of a lot of horrible shit this guy did that he left behind, but our friend didn’t want to harm him or something so we respected her wishes on that not going to the police. (Who probably wouldn’t have done anything anyways)
It was exhausting, emotionally draining, hard work but I was glad to do it, I imagine you feel similarly
I have accompanied my friend to the DV support office today and listened through a detailed account of what he did. It’s tough to listen to. Tough to come to terms with the fact that there is so little actual help available, and all of it is excruciatingly slow to arrive and locked behind bureaucratic barriers. Tough to come to terms with the fact that so many women, myself included, easily fall prey to bullshit artists on a power trip, or man sized toddlers with puppy eyes, or a mix of the two. And it’s always women who I would have thought far beyond such situations. I feel I still haven’t understood what went on inside of myself as I lived through this shit and didn’t leave, and I haven’t understood what happens inside of these guys, how they can turn from decent person into absolute shitshow within days or months.
I expect to see rather more of this as people get driven to the edge by the ongoing financial, social, political crisis all around us.